Self Improvement 30: Pick Your Own Path
Are you doing what you want to do?
Are you going in the direction you want to go?
Are you making decisions about where your life is going?
There are several possible answers to these questions. You may not be doing what you want to do, but you are moving in the direction of getting there. If you are not moving in the direction you want to be then the question is are you in charge of where you are going.
Over the last month, I have written about the things that can improve your life. Some of these you can do even if you are in solitary confinement. For the others, you need to assume control of your life. You you have a job that is not all you want it to be? Are you in a relationship that might be better dissolved? Are you held back by people or circumstances that no longer match your goals? It may well be that some parts of your life are in perfect order moving along in the right direction and giving you a lot of satisfaction. However, there might be parts of your life, personal or professional, where you feel trapped. You have the power to change that.
Sell your crap. Pay your debt. Do what you love. Adam Baker
In this TED video is one way you can go:
Inspiring TEDxAsheville presentation by Adam Baker about what freedom means to you and how most of us opt for the default. In 2008, after the birth of his first child, Baker and his wife decided to sell everything they owned, pay off their consumer debt, and spend a year traveling abroad as a family. They began sharing their journey in early 2009 on the blog Man vs. Debt, now 15000 subscribers strong. In sharing their ups and downs in the areas of personal finance, consumerism, clutter, travel, minimalism, and passionate entrepreneurship, they realized they aren’t alone in a desire to explore and grow.
You can make a decision and pick your path
Think about your goals in life and where you want to go, career, relationships, personal growth. To help you get a better idea of where to go and what is your current potential make a list of your interests. But don’t let your present stop you. If you have always wanted to do something, then make a decision and learn something new and exciting.
When you consider your current situation think about what you would do differently if you knew then what you know now. If I only knew then that this is a true client from hell, I would have never signed them up. Make a decision, cut them loose.
Pick your own path!
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. ~~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Eliminate the negative
I once dated a girl briefly who told me that at her own wedding she was thinking about what she was doing there. There was so much social pressure and possible losing face involved that she went along with it. Needless to say that the marriage didn’t last long. You may not have a situation that’s so extreme, but in many situations, we just tag along not wanting to make a fuss. Stop it! Eliminate the negative and speak up for yourself. Don’t be that girl!
Make a decision
You may feel that you are stuck and you can’t change the situation. Start building an escape route on the side. Cut your time wasters, stop watching TV and use that time to find new ways to make money, attend new social circles, get a hobby or find other ways to start building your new life. It may take time but be consistent, and you will get there. Being stuck is a situation that needs action to be unstuck. That action needs a decision that may be really hard to make. But if you are going to make that decision, then the right time is sooner than later.
Ask for what you want
What’s the worst that can happen? The worst-case scenario is the main question in any situation and decision. If the answer is something you can live with then go ahead, do it. If the worst is really bad, potential loss of all savings and income, ending up in a homeless shelter, then you need to find someone to help you. In some relationships, the worst can mean physical harm. That is, even more, the reason to act now. Do not let other people and circumstances destroy you. Get the negative stuff out of your life and replace it with positive goals and friends that support you. In many cases, you just have to ask for what you want and you will get it.
Ray Dalio Principles: Plan for the worst-case scenario to make it as good as possible.
Pick Your Own Path!
In any case starting on the new path is usually the hardest thing, so act now. To test your new path, take small steps. Do something every day that will move you closer to where you want to be. Make it 30-day challenge and see what happens if you keep at it for a whole month, no excuses.
This means you need to get more control and flexibility in your life. To do that understand what’s really happening and why you want something to change. Make the initial plan and contingency to be flexible. Every plan will change as soon as you start implementing it so accept whatever comes, give it your best and improvise. Take responsibility as you are in charge. If everything is not working out as planned, don’t give up, learn from experience and repeat.
Now, what do you really want in life? Pick your path. Act now, take the first step!
Do you want to be strong to pick your path? Willpower books help you get better results. Dig into these books and find out how willpower works and motivate yourself not to fall back to old ways.
Also published on Medium.